Meet Shane Kohler | Conscious Relationship and Dating Coach

We had the good fortune of connecting with Shane Kohler and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Shane, what role has risk played in your life or career?
I learned to live with uncertainty from a very young age and while that’s definitely caused some setbacks in certain areas of my life, it has been a huge attribute for my success. I learned to look at the long game, where do I want to be in 5 years or 10 years and what is the most important thing to do at this stage in my life to end up there? That’s what really matters, nothing else. So I didn’t cling to any job for security, I kept my expenses very low and was able to dedicate most of my time to growing myself and my business. I used the skills I had to pick up little jobs and things to get by and staked 100% of my future in my dream. That is the risk that most people are not willing to take, they want a safe bet, something to fall back on. We do this in life and in love and we can never truly succeed without being all in. There have been many failures, it’s part of the process but failure offers an opportunity to learn and improve. So the only real risk in life is remaining comfortable and never dedicating yourself to your passion. Everything else you can recover from but that, not so much.

Can you give our readers an introduction to your business? Maybe you can share a bit about what you do and what sets you apart from others?
The Living Relationship was started by myself and Fatima (my wife) with the intention to support people in manifesting healthy and happy love. What I thought, in the beginning, would be an easy way to meet lots of people, teach cool stuff, and have some fun has become my life’s passion and a personal journey of transformation that has gone to the very depths of my own soul.

As the brand started to grow, we were getting a lot of attention and running quite a few programs. At one time Fatima and I were running 4 programs at once! That means after both of us working a full day, we would work usually till 8-9 o’clock 4 nights/week. While that was exhausting and unsustainable, the work wasn’t the worst part. It was the feeling that something was missing and I couldn’t figure out what. I felt there was another level of depth and heart to the work but I didn’t know how to bring that.

Fatima was diagnosed with breast cancer and our lives got turned upside down. We stopped all of our programs (we were in the middle of one when we got the diagnosis) and Fatima took a step back from the brand altogether. I did very little with it for about six months. I was coaching maybe 6-7 clients and reposting some old content on social media but we were going through a dark night of the soul and it was occupying most of our time.

The cancer was the most challenging thing that either of us had been through and truly pushed us to our limits. I’m happy to say today that Fatima is healthy and cancer-free today and the future is looking really bright for us but that was definitely a dark period. In a strange way though, I think it’s what the brand and we needed. We needed to stop, regroup, refocus, and have a new vision for the future. During that time, I did a 40 day meditation practice with the intention of really getting clear on a new direction for the brand and what has emerged since has been truly miraculous.

I feel that the messages and content now are coming from a deeper place in my soul, our following has grown and is growing more rapidly than ever, and the recent program I launched had more interest than I was able to accommodate. This is what I’ve learned, we have to get off of that grind and take the time to search our own souls. We can’t keep hustling for money or success. It will only come in small amounts and temporarily and it will leave us exhausted. We have to search our souls for our calling and give that completely from our hearts, when we do we make the right connections and success unfolds naturally and easily.

This isn’t something you get and then you have it, it’s a daily practice to make sure you’re coming from the right place.

Let’s say your best friend was visiting the area and you wanted to show them the best time ever. Where would you take them? Give us a little itinerary – say it was a week long trip, where would you eat, drink, visit, hang out, etc.
I always enjoy a walk through Wynwood. Love hitting up Beaker and Gray for brunch on the weekends. Fatima and I will often enjoy a weekend in South Beach. We love the dining and walking there, and our favorite little place is at the bottom tip. There’s a cafe called Lilikoi Organic Living and when we’re in South Beach, we pretty much spend the whole day working there.

The Shoutout series is all about recognizing that our success and where we are in life is at least somewhat thanks to the efforts, support, mentorship, love and encouragement of others. So is there someone that you want to dedicate your shoutout to?
My biggest shoutout is to God because when I follow guidance everything goes amazing and when I don’t, it gets tough. My wife Fatima is my rock and biggest supporter, she helped me start this brand, continues to help me grow it, and gives me her love and dedication every day. I would not be who I am without that. Over the years I’ve participated in so many programs and worked with so many coaches and they have all been amazing. I really have to take so little credit because all I did was adapt the tools and insights that have been shared with me by people who learned the hard way so I wouldn’t have to.

Each coach I’ve worked with has offered me something unique and powerful and taken me to a place I could not have gotten to on my own, Therapy has been particularly powerful for me as well. The personal commitment to heal and the willingness to find healers and allow them to support us is essential to having any real success in life.

Website: www.thelivingrelationship.com

Instagram: @the_living_relationship

Facebook: The Living Relationship

Youtube: The Living Relationship

Other: TikTok: @shanekohler

Image Credits
Shane Kohler Fatima daCosta Kohler Dave Mainville